Popchips and rice cakes

(looking at snacks table)

Patrick: Why do we have Popchips?  They taste like cardboard slices.

Jenny: No, that's rice cakes.

Patrick: Oh yeah, people should know what they are getting into when they buy rice cakes.

Comparing purses and Macs

Jenny: So a good purse is like a good investment, because you don't keep buying the same thing over and over, every couple of years.  Like buying a Windows machine with a Mac shell, versus investing in a real Mac.

Patrick: Who would be stupid enough to do that?

My son still doesn't know what I do for a living...

I know that because he texted me asking "Hey do you build good websites?"

On Bitcoins

Patrick: It requires a lot of computational power to mine a Bitcoin and you will need specialised hash-creating equipment to do that.  You are like, 2 years too late for that.

Colleague:  So why did't you do it before?

Patrick:  Well if I wanted to mine a Bitcoin I would have started 2 years ago.  If I start now I could probably get a quarter.

On Microsoft Visual Studio

(At stand-up)

Patrick: I've been fixing Visual Studio for 4 hours.

Colleague: Were you fixing Visual Studios or fixing Microsoft? (chuckles)

Patrick:  If I was fixing Microsoft, it would take me a lot longer.

On TeamCity

TeamShitty is broken again.

On TSA Pre-check Fails

When people go through TSA pre-check with coins in their pockets or keys or phones or whatever, it beeps and you were wondering why, you should just go home and start over.